Cheater Circuit on the Ides

So I started to write something on the 3rd about my drive home from near Nashville and my alternator and the ford dealer, but then I didn't and I left town for a week and now, well, it's now... beware the ides of march, and all that.

But what inspired me to get on my ass and write this was my scale. See, one day I stepped on a scale at the gym and it said I was 218 pounds. I didn't like that very much. So I went on the net and researched all about home scales until I found one that was accurate to .1 pounds, or claimed to be. Several people noted how if they weighed themselves, then stepped off, then back on and weighed again it was always the same. Well, that's what I wanted in my scale so I shopped around and bought one.

It's an awfully nice looking thing so even if someday my bathroom has nice looking things in it it won't be out of place. It's important to plan ahead. So I started weighing myself Monday mornings and keeping track of my weight in a little bitty spreadsheet. The rule was if I didn't lose weight I had to do 100 pushups. Heck, here's my progress:

Date
Poundage
Jan 6
213.9
Jan 13
212.5
Jan 20
211
Jan 27
209.9
Feb 4
209.3
Feb 10
208.2
Feb 17
208.2 (Pushups!)
Feb 24
207.1
March 3
206.8

Anyway, so I'm slowly wasting away to nothing. I figure by the end of next year I'll weigh 115 pounds or so. But back to wherever I was heading. A few times I stepped off and then back on and, indeed, it always showed the same weight, but I was getting suspicious.

See, the first time you weigh yourself it smoothly closes in on its final reading, say, 206.8. But if you step off and then get back on it sometimes closes smoothly on, say, 206.4 and then jumps to 206.8 and blinks happily. So it was my theory that it was a cheater circuit. One day I asked Lindsay to come be my cute little helper girl. I weighed myself, say, 207.1. Then she weighed herself. Then I got back on... voila! 207.4. My scale cheats.

But that's ok with me. In fact, I think it's really funny.

Doug's thoughts on nothing in particular